Ping,
As a respected authority on topics on and off the track, I must ask for your insight. When I go to the lake for the first time each year, I skip the hassle of applying sun block. There is nothing like a good burn at the start of a summer to darken my skin and condition it for a summer at the lake and at the track. As I age and learn there is wisdom in my wife’s nagging about wearing sun block, I present the following thought: Is there really a difference in the various S.P.F. levels? Could it all be a corporate hoax? For example, could I take S.P.F 10, apply two coats and consider it S.P.F. 20?
Mason
Dear Mason,
I once had a similar theory about girls I was dating. If I couldn’t be with a girl who was a ten, then perhaps I could have two girlfriends that were fives and be just as happy. Sadly, it didn’t work out that well. Trying to date two women simultaneously seemed like a good idea when I was young, but I ended up getting caught and dumped… twice. Likewise, the idea of not wearing sunscreen to get a "good burn" at the start of the summer is evenly coated in stupidity. Wear a big hat if you are going to be in the sun all day and put whatever sunscreen on that you can find. That sweet, even tan you like so much now will leave you leathery and shriveled like a set of Home Depot work gloves when you near retirement age. It’s your choice, Marlboro Man.
PING
Dear Ping,
What is the deal with Jeff Emig's watch? Holy crap! That thing is nearly as big as Ralph Sheheen's head. Honestly, his watch could double as a pit board. I get arm pump just looking at it. I realize that I may be overreacting, but even Flavor Flav would be envious.
Don
P.S.
Supercross and motocross may be seasonal, but I get my Ask Ping! fix every Friday. Thanks and keep up the good work.
Dear Don,
Fro has always liked his bling extra big. Why have a motor home when you can have a custom tour bus? Why wear off the rack when you can afford designer? And, in this instance, why have a reasonable watch when you can sport an oversized timepiece from the Puff Daddy wristwatch collection? Yeaaaah, booooy!
PING
Mr. Ping, sir,
I am an avid reader of your material and admire your way with words. I have noticed, though, that when you get a new word, you like to wring it out a bit. I guess this comes from testing bikes - you just naturally want
to see what the word'll do, how it handles, and whether or not you can beat someone with it. Anyhoo (see, I pay attention!), I've noticed that you haven't used the word "shart" for a while. For several months there, you
were sharting here and sharting there and sharting everywhere. Have you discovered the limits of that word or have you just changed your diet?
Curious,
HighPlainsSquid
Bryan in NM
Dear Bryan,
I guess when I find a word I like I tend to use it until I’m sick of it. And I’m just fascinated with the verb "shart." It’s like sitting down at the blackjack table in Vegas and doubling down. Sometimes you get the face card you want and that nervous feeling you have inside disappears as they slide your new stack of chips over. Other times you roll a cheek and crap your pants. It’s a diabolical game of cat-and-mouse between your G.I. tract and your doo-doo ring piece that really keeps you on your toes. I was big on "assface" for quite a while and still like to pull it out now and again. Hey, if I knew you better I might even be able to use it here. I’m sure there are a few other word that I’ll keep banging away at like a coked-up monkey on a snare drum but, in time, I’ll move on to something else. So if you don’t like my current vocabulary… just hang in there for a few weeks and it will change.
PING
Have a question for Ping? Email him at ping@racerxonline.com.
