The holidays are upon us, which means it’s time to hang with family, including that one uncle who everyone “loves.” We’re talking about Uncle Phil Nicoletti, of course, and just like your swashbuckling uncle, Uncle Phil begrudgingly dispenses information and advice whenever asked, some of which is incredibly wise, the rest is ridiculous, but it’s all always comedy gold.
As always, be sure to send your questions about racing, politics, or family values, to Phil@racerxonline.com. Now, let's get to this week's questions.
Sacred and all-powerful Phil,
Some of my riding buddies and I are also in our own fantasy football league. I know you probably care about football as much as you care about the week’s talking points from the Left, but that’s okay, I still think you can help with our situation. You see, we still haven’t come up with a proper punishment for losing, and since your nickname actually contains the word Filthy, we thought you’d be perfect for picking out a nasty consequence. So what should it be? Race a GNCC with no clutch lever? Ask Weege for tech tips? Wear a Vince Friese jersey for a year every time we ride? Can’t wait to hear what you come up with.
-Carefree Karl
Karl,
Ahh mannnnn. Well, asking Weege for tech tips puts you in danger, so I would highly advise you not to do that one if you truly care about your friend. I feel like punishment shouldn’t last longer than a day. Going over a jump on a bike prepped by Weege could be life changing in the worst way.
To stick someone in a Friese jersey every time he rides is just cruel. Only because he wouldn’t be able to mimic Vince’s tactics on the track—I don’t think your buddy has that in him. But I like the idea of him running a GNCC with no clutch lever. That’s a pretty good one. It’s for one day, and he’ll be miserable for two or three hours. They would have to wear a GoPro, because they will end up being a YouTube star from all the carnage. He has to finish the race, too. If they DNF the race, they must go to another GNCC until the race is complete. Maybe throw a beer chug between every pit stop as well. A strong beer too, like 7-8 percent abv. Catch a buzz, then maneuver the trees and hills with no clutch. ALL F$&@?!/ TIME footage! No slipper clutch is allowed either. Let me know when this happens, or send an update because that would be worth following!
Phil
Philthy Phil,
Two-part question for you. First, we all know you’re a grump and you hate everyone. That’s established and well documented. But c’mon, there’s got to be something you’re thankful for and in the spirit of Thanksgiving, I’d like to know what it is.
Secondly, you’re around the young bucks coming up through the ranks in racing quite a bit. Do they drive you nuts with their energy and exuberance? Or do you find yourself smiling at their antics and actually learning a thing or two from the way they approach the craft?
Thanks,
Bright Side Bob
B.S. Bob,
I’m thankful for A LOT of shit. My health, my family’s health, my close friends, my longtime sponsors, my career, all the places I’ve seen and been to. I can go on and on. But mostly, for my family’s health. You can have everything in the world, but if your health is shit, nothing else even matters.
I am around a lot of kids. My attitudes have changed over the past five-seven years to now. The useless kids used to piss me the F$&@ off, a lot. They always have excuses, are always quitting, and never doing the extra mile. Always complaining about what I have, or what people get, and they don’t. They don't realize that 15 years ago I didn’t have shit (and I still don’t have shit, really). But now, I couldn’t care less if they don’t try. At the end of the day, it’s their parents’ money they are wasting away. Not really my problem. But, there are good ones. Ones who grind, and do go the extra mile. Ones that come from families that don’t have much and go the extra bit. Don't get me wrong, there are kids who come from no money that are useless, too. There are kids who come from no money that work and know what they want and have drive. There are kids who come from money that are useless. There are kids who come from money that work and know what they want and have drive. It’s all about how you’re raised IMO.
As far as practicing, I like riding around with the kids. I’ve said it before, it makes me feel like a kid still. Yes, I’m 34, but I enjoy riding with people. I like when they have good days and they’re shredding. I’m mature enough to put my ego aside when they are faster, or can throw down heaters on a Tuesday and I tell them they are rolling. I didn’t used to be like that. But I can guarantee you, if it’s a Saturday at an AMA national, I’ll work those little pricks!
Phil
Hi Phil,
Do teams buy other manufactures’ bikes and have their pro riders, like yourself, test them to see if you can find anything to apply on your bike? If so, is it done in the secret of the night so you will never be caught on a non-blue machine?
Brian M.
Brian,
I can personally say I’ve never tested another manufacturer’s bike with a while employed by another manufacturer. As far as one manufacturer having another manufacturer’s bike on the dyno in their race shop, absolutely. I mean, the extent of testing is limited because the bikes are in stock form. But 100 percent it happens. Think of Pro Circuit for instance, and all the different bikes they dyno. How much of the knowledge gets transferred? Who knows. But I’m sure Triumph was definitely doing some serious R&D in the beginning comparing their test bikes to other motorcycles to see where they stacked up.
Phil
