Ping,
When you are discussing MX with people outside of the industry do you still find yourself making the "RRRrrRrrAAAARrrrAAARrraarararar" sound and moving your hand up and down (as a bike going through the gears? )
Roy
Dear Roy,
You know, I used to do that quite a bit. If I hopped off a curb or leaped over a small gap I would let out an instinctive “Braaap.” But when the sport switched to four-strokes there was no way to make that transition. I have yet to hear someone do a good four-stroke impression; they usually just sound like they are trying to cough up a partially chewed piece of steak. It’s the end of an era for me, Roy. And maybe it’s a good thing. It’s practically impossible to command any respect when you are in a room full of people that don’t know motocross and you do your best imitation of a 250 ripping across a set of whoops: “Braaadadadadadadadada.” Do that in a job interview and the next thing you’re guaranteed to hear is, “Yeah, we’ve got your resume… we’ll be in touch. Buh-bye.”
If I can ever perfect the four-stoke you can bet your sweet ass that I’ll be bringing it back.
PING
Dear Ping,
This is more of a general question than a moto-specific query. Can you tell me why this country is getting lazier and fatter by the day? I am growing more and more disgusted with the obesity and despicable work ethic of this generation. Is TLD selling more XXL sized gear these days?
Hank Beems
Dear Hank,
We are a bunch of lazy fatties, aren’t we? I couldn’t agree with you more, Hank. I mean, I don’t think that everyone needs to look like Kate Moss on the third week of a cleanse. Most of us couldn’t afford the amount of cocaine it would take to look like her anyway. But when a guy gets to the point where he can’t see his wedding tackle anymore then it’s time to put down the extra large sausage pizza with extra sausage and go for a walk. I think the problem with obesity is directly related to the work ethic and attitude of this generation. Their entitlement mentality has created a bunch of whiny kids that are too lazy to work for anything, including a six-pack [abdominal muscles or malted beverage]. And the bottom line is that staying fit isn’t easy, especially as you get older. I got angry the other night when I saw that my wife had framed a picture of her with another man; A man with a defined jaw line and ten percent body fat. Then I realized that handsome, svelte bastard was me when we were dating ten years ago.
I don’t know if Troy is selling more large pants now than he was a decade ago but I know I see more fat kids than I used to. Sadly, the only motocross they are likely to do is on a Sony Playstation.
PING
Ping-a-Ling,
Are you coming to Loretta’s this Year? The 30-plus class is ready for ya’.
Landon
Dear Landon,
I’m not going to make there this year. It always sounds like a great idea until I really have to sit down and figure out the logistics of taking my whole family to a dude ranch in Tennessee for a week in the heat and humidity of August. And then the same thought always hits me: I’d rather spend my vacation days in Hawaii. Maybe next year?
Mahalo.
PING
When you are discussing MX with people outside of the industry do you still find yourself making the "RRRrrRrrAAAARrrrAAARrraarararar" sound and moving your hand up and down (as a bike going through the gears? )
Roy
Dear Roy,
You know, I used to do that quite a bit. If I hopped off a curb or leaped over a small gap I would let out an instinctive “Braaap.” But when the sport switched to four-strokes there was no way to make that transition. I have yet to hear someone do a good four-stroke impression; they usually just sound like they are trying to cough up a partially chewed piece of steak. It’s the end of an era for me, Roy. And maybe it’s a good thing. It’s practically impossible to command any respect when you are in a room full of people that don’t know motocross and you do your best imitation of a 250 ripping across a set of whoops: “Braaadadadadadadadada.” Do that in a job interview and the next thing you’re guaranteed to hear is, “Yeah, we’ve got your resume… we’ll be in touch. Buh-bye.”
If I can ever perfect the four-stoke you can bet your sweet ass that I’ll be bringing it back.
PING
Dear Ping,
This is more of a general question than a moto-specific query. Can you tell me why this country is getting lazier and fatter by the day? I am growing more and more disgusted with the obesity and despicable work ethic of this generation. Is TLD selling more XXL sized gear these days?
Hank Beems
Dear Hank,
We are a bunch of lazy fatties, aren’t we? I couldn’t agree with you more, Hank. I mean, I don’t think that everyone needs to look like Kate Moss on the third week of a cleanse. Most of us couldn’t afford the amount of cocaine it would take to look like her anyway. But when a guy gets to the point where he can’t see his wedding tackle anymore then it’s time to put down the extra large sausage pizza with extra sausage and go for a walk. I think the problem with obesity is directly related to the work ethic and attitude of this generation. Their entitlement mentality has created a bunch of whiny kids that are too lazy to work for anything, including a six-pack [abdominal muscles or malted beverage]. And the bottom line is that staying fit isn’t easy, especially as you get older. I got angry the other night when I saw that my wife had framed a picture of her with another man; A man with a defined jaw line and ten percent body fat. Then I realized that handsome, svelte bastard was me when we were dating ten years ago.
I don’t know if Troy is selling more large pants now than he was a decade ago but I know I see more fat kids than I used to. Sadly, the only motocross they are likely to do is on a Sony Playstation.
PING
Ping-a-Ling,
Are you coming to Loretta’s this Year? The 30-plus class is ready for ya’.
Landon
Dear Landon,
I’m not going to make there this year. It always sounds like a great idea until I really have to sit down and figure out the logistics of taking my whole family to a dude ranch in Tennessee for a week in the heat and humidity of August. And then the same thought always hits me: I’d rather spend my vacation days in Hawaii. Maybe next year?
Mahalo.
PING
