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Ask Ping!

April 3, 2009 12:07pm | by: David Pingree
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  • Ask Ping!
Dear Ping,

I don't know if I should come out in public and say that I was watching American Idol the other night, but I thought I saw Chad Reed wearing eye make up, a fancy man-do and he had his nails painted black. He was singing like somebody had kicked him straight in his balls. I thought I was seeing things, but again this week there he was (a little more subdued with his attire) still crying about the kick to the nads (singing). Seems like everybody is enjoying his screeching. Being true to his artist alter ego he is going by the name Adam Lambert. I'm not computer savvy enough to attach a picture with this e-mail, but if you Google his stage name you will see him in all his Bratz doll glory. I'm baffled his ability to train, race, win, make Ford commercials and spend time with his voice coach. I guess all the attention on Bubba's pre-race shenanigans finally got to him. Is it really him?

Miguel

Phoenix, AZ

Dear Miguel,

Watching American Idol is nothing to be ashamed of. I don’t get to see the show with the regularity I have in the past but I have seen Reed/Lambert perform a few times. The best/worst performance he gave was on country night when he did the Johnny Cash classic, Ring of Fire. I thought Randy Travis was going to vomit all over his designer snakeskin crap kickers right there on live television. Between the sitar and the dramatic pelvic thrusts during that song I had a mini throw-up in my mouth too. But for some reason… I also really liked it. The kid’s got talent. I want to see him belt out a Skid Row tune because he’s got the pipes to do it. What is even more impressive is the fact that he is leading the point standings in the supercross series right now. He’s “Blowin’ it out tha box!” as my man Randy Jackson would say.

Vote for Reed/Lambert!

PING

Hey Ping,

Is it just me or has Denny Stephenson been moonlighting as the freecreditreport.com commercial guy?  You know, like the one where they roll off of the used car lot in the hoopty Geo Metro, pull up to the stop light singing the free-credit-report.com baby song, and get laughed at by some hot chicks in Mustang or something when they dump the clutch and stall it out.

Take Care,

Jamie Parkhurst

Oxford, MI

Dear Jamie,

There is absolutely no way that Denny Stephenson was either driving a Geo Metro or getting laughed at by hot chicks. His facial hair and million-watt smile are just too awesome for that to happen. It is a fact that his stubble is the only thing that can make Chuck Norris cry. But you can catch Chad Reed on American Idol weeknights at 8/7 central.

PING

Dear Ping,

For the 2009 Supercross season I have been curious if “Factory Yamaha” has been placed on very tight budget restrictions? This would include graphics and plastics.

It appears they have found some “leftover” front fenders from Bob Hannah’s days at Yamaha and painted them the factory blue hue. I can only wonder if Broc Hepler would be able to clear supercross jumps without injury if not for the added air drag of a front fender which is even with the top of the front number plate. I’m convinced Josh Hill was promised a JGR or San Manuel Yamaha fender for a podium, thus the charge to the front in Toronto. Why are the factory Yamaha’s so dull, even J-Law has an eye catching bike. What gives?

Joel Doupe'

Lewiston Idaho

Dear Joel,

Yeah, I’m not sure what is going on there. All across our sport, budgets have been cut shorter than Britney Spears hair when she lost her mind and buzzed her head. That might explain the rather ho-hum graphic scheme on their bikes but I am at a loss for words when it comes to that front fender. Maybe that box of fenders got stuck in a box in Phoenix during the summer with a pallet of anvils sitting on top of them and they got smashed flat. It’s like a trucker hat for the front of Hill and Hepler’s bikes. It looks more like a snow shovel than a front fender. Let’s hope the economy turns around soon so the boys in blue don’t have to run such ridiculous mudguards.

PING

Got a question for David Pingree to answer? Email him at ping@racerxonline.com.
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