by Aaron Hansel
Cool as Hell: Junk Bikes for Sale
Friday, September 21, 2012 | 4:10 PM
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PrintAs motorcycle enthusiasts, many of us have been in the position of shopping for a used dirt bike by skimming the classifieds, perusing Ebay or sorting through the scraped helmets and rusty, bent-up used parts that make up the, “Motorcycles,” section on Craigslist. Terms such as, never raced, low hours and, perfect condition, often accompany the ads for these machines, and when making a bike look good is often as easy as a quick pressure wash and new plastics and graphics, it can be hard to tell when a seller is lying or telling the truth. These types of deals can be scary, but there is a type of seller out there that provides an even scarier buying experience. That’s right, we’re talking about the person who makes no attempt to clean or pretty up a bike before selling it. The lack of effort seems to scream, “No amount of work can make this hunk of metal desirable.” So, for your enjoyment, we clicked through a few Craigslist ads and came up with two comical ads. Read our evaluations, and list your conclusion on what bike is the better or worse purchase in the comments section below.
Click image to view ad
Just looking at this bike is enough to make a potential buyer’s mind start compiling a list of what might fall off should the bike ever become airborne for more than a few milliseconds. Check out that front number plate fitment! Although there is no mention of it in the ad, the top triple clamp is clearly aftermarket, and is likely the cause of the wayward number plate. But judging by the mismatched exhaust components, we’re guessing attention to detail ranks somewhere near the bottom of the current owner’s priority list. Then there’s the NorCal Bear sticker on the gas tank, which is a sure sign the owner most likely rides in a basketball jersey with a helmet that’s missing its visor. It’s a wonder this bike doesn’t have shorty fenders and cutouts in the air box.
Potentially upping the value is the claim of new tires, sprockets and chain. The tires do indeed look good, but the chain and sprockets look questionable. In addition, the chain looks to be holding more tension than a drunken anger management therapy session, which makes one wonder about the claim of professional maintenance and service.
At $1700, which is just a small amount below high bluebook value, this deal doesn’t seem too sweet. Oh well, at least it comes with an extra spark plug and throttle cable.
Click image to view ad.
Two for one is always a good deal when you’re buying a new hat or T-shirt, but when it comes to dirt bikes, the two-for-the-price-of-one situation is usually more accurately described as double trouble. That said, these two bikes actually look amazingly clean for their age. Perhaps this is what the owner was referring to when he mentioned the beauty of the two-stroke? That beauty has been enhanced by the application of several million stickers per bike, too. Adding further value is that both bikes have been rebuilt. The RM even has a new sleeve. No need to ask questions why the sleeve had to be replaced, we’re sure no chunks dropped into the bottom end, and the ports in the new sleeve are sure to match up. Right?
The biggest weakness of this deal is that the seller wants to move two bikes at a time. Unless you’re buying bikes for Travis Pastrana to backflip into the Grand Canyon, who needs two old dirt bikes? It’s not as if 250 two-strokes from the early 90s are the latest craze to hit the streets. Further inhibiting the deal is the price. High book on these two beauties totals roughly $2,000 (interestingly enough, the ’90 Honda has a higher bluebook value than the ’93 Suzuki), and when you can pick up a bike that’s easily fifteen years newer for the same amount the seller wants for these Jeff Stanton and Guy Cooper replicas, this isn’t exactly the deal of the decade. But hey, we’re sure there’s someone out there that appreciates the power and beauty of the two-stroke enough to put down the Budweiser long enough to load these babies into the back of a Bronco and speed off in the direction of the nearest gravel pit.
Click image to view ad.
Usually when someone is selling a pair of bikes that don’t run, it’s with the intention of combining parts from both machines to build one that is somewhat functional. But in this situation, that doesn’t appear to be an option. It’d probably be shorter to list what’s NOT missing on the ’00, and we’re not sure what that fuel tank came off of, although we can all agree that you don’t want to come up short with that tower in your crotch. The seller is not without a sense of humor, however, as the rear fender is adorned with an FMF sticker, yet the bike is missing any type of exhaust. At least the carburetor is being stored safely in the dirt and rocks.
The ’93 appears to be mostly all there, but alas, the motor is blown. The seller mentions that the jug (that’s redneck for cylinder) has been re-plated, but we’re thinking he’s been sipping a jug of moonshine if he hopes to push this backwoods deal through for $1200. The best deal here would be for the seller to pay someone the price he is asking in order to remove these clappers from his property.
Click image to view ad.
Yes, we saved the best ad for last. If we didn’t know that this bike was listed out of Sacramento, Calif., we’d wonder what part of South America it was located, as the seller seems to lack a working knowledge of the English language. We do like how like how upfront the seller is about the potential hotness of the bike in the ad though, as illustrated by the statement, “ I no paper work bill of sale if ask for it.”
Without even taking into account the broken rear fender and plastics that have faded more than Michael Vick’s glory, it’s obvious this little pittster is in need of some serious repair. Not to worry, by the looks of it, it’s a knock-off of a Japanese machine, and parts can’t be hard to find for these single run Chinese contraptions, right? And what’s with the FirePoliceMX.com fender stickers? Perhaps it’s the seller’s, “Back the Badge” bumper sticker attempt at smoothing things over if he ever gets pulled over while practicing wheelies on the street?
We think this bike is $400, although the final words of the ad, “$400 obo thang,” left us guessing. If the price tag is indeed $400, it seems a bit steep, as it’s sure to become an unwanted backyard decoration when it inevitably breaks down. Still, it’s quite a bit cheaper than the YZ450, that, with its extraordinarily tight chain and roached out appearance looks as though it’s just waiting patiently to throw its rider over a cliff somewhere deep in the woods.
Now it’s time to tell us what you think. Zip-tied YZ450 with new tires, double trouble, one-and-a-half KXs or roached-out pittster with “clean car” and “no paper work?” Tell us in the comments section below.
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Jew juan to buy mi dirr bike?
here is a common ad in oregon........Honda for sale.(notice lack of model or year)...perfect condition.....might need clutch and starter......been stored for 12 years ...had new battery....seat is torn and needs one tire. Motor ran great but won't turn over....$1200 or trade for good rifle. also includes helmet but the rats kinda got into it....
@tonewall sounds like somthing you would hear in oregon, or alaska.
http://cleveland.craigslist.org/mcy/3251368323.html
How about this one!
Haha...thats the first thing you always do, bore out a fresh re-sleeve to get that 125 to 201cc
HA HA... "the wires for the ignition module corroded away that is the only problem with it". Never mind no airbox, exhaust, etc. classic!
Best craigslist ad by far, don't have the link but heres the post. You can find it on brotocross.
Buy It – OK, let me start off by saying this kx is only available for purchase by the manliest of men (or women). My friend, if it was possible for a dirt bike to sprout chest hair and a five o’clock shadow, this Kawasaki would look like Tom Selleck. It is just that manly.
It was never intended to ride down a grass filled ditch in your LBZ baggy gear looking like a spode. It wasn’t meant to do 3-foot long pop wheelies in front of your hillbilly friends in your cousin’s back yard while everyone drinks Budweiser. No, that’s what a 95 CR 125 is for. If that’s the kind of bike you’re looking for, then just do us all a favor and stop reading right now. This bike has been to hell and back, twice, and has the scars to prove it. So if you can’t handle being seen behind the bars of this biblical, fire breathing, dragon slaying hero because it has a few purple hearts, move on.
This bike was engineered by 3rd degree ninja pirate super-warriors in the highest mountains of Japan to serve the needs of the man that cheats death on a daily basis. They didn’t even consider superfluous Nancy boy, contradictory decor in the form of Monster, Red Bull, Spy, Oakley, FMF, and Pro Circuit stickers plastered all over the bike. This bike looks legit because it is.
This brute comes with the things us testosterone-fueled super action junkies need. It has a 125cc bottom end paired with a 144 big bore kit to outrun the cops (and other bikes on the track) and has a 6-speed transmission so you know grandma won’t be taking off with it when you’re not looking. It’s saved my bacon more than once. It’s got special blood/gore resistant grippy seat cover. It even has a first-aid kit in the back. You know what the first aid kit has in it? A pint of whiskey, a stitch-your-own-wound kit and a hunk of leather to bite down on when you’re operating on yourself. (NOTE: I cut myself fighting a Grizzly who looked at me funny and used the first aid kit, a replacement kit is available for an additional $100 and comes with Gentleman’s Jack.)
My price on this bad boy is an incredibly low $1700 but I’ll entertain reasonable offers. And by reasonable, I mean don’t walk up and tell me you’ll give me $500 for it. That’s liable to earn you a Burmese-roundhouse-sphincter-kick with a follow up three fingered eye-jab. Would it hurt? Hell yeah. Let’s just say you won’t be the prettiest guy at the Coldplay concert anymore.
There’s only 10 hours on this hellcat from Planet Kickass since a complete motor rebuild from the cases up. Trust me, it will outlive you and the offspring that will carry your name. It will live on as a monument to your machismo.
Now, go look in the mirror and tell me what you see. If it’s a rugged, no holds barred, super brute he-man macho Chuck Norris stunt double, then reply to this ad. I might be out hang-gliding or BASE jumping or just chilling with my lady, but leave a message and I’ll get back to you. And when I do, we’ll talk about a price over a nice glass of Schmidt while we listen to Johnny Cash.
In addition to the big bore kit, and other goodies you can see in the pictures (like graphics kit, Renthal chain/sprockets, Pro Circuit pipe and silencer), this beast also comes with the best tuned suspension I have ridden on (and I have ridden a lot) set up for a 165-170 lb rider, V Force Reeds, Twin Air filter, and brand spankin new grips (whoa!).
God bless – Buy It
Check these out...
http://southjersey.craigslist.org/mcy/3283636845.html
Which one is the parts bike, and what year was the XR200 a full on motocross bike????? Nice bearings too.....
http://delaware.craigslist.org/mcy/3256923691.html
For Sale !
2010 Honda CRF250 full FC motor and suspension
Never raced practiced on 2 seasons only
J Barcia
Good one 151 rider
Reading these ads makes my wallet hurt. Just think that at one point, these bikes were brand new and had a proud owner sitting astride them. Flash forward from that vision of hope to the deeply depressing pics on craigslist and then think of the wanton and gratuitus carnage that the owners had to inflict - it staggers the imagination. And to think these people are encouraged to vote...
Check this baby out!
http://portland.craigslist.org/clc/mcy/3287953638.html
Another sweeeeet ride here:
http://portland.craigslist.org/mlt/mcy/3287867925.html
This guy has chutzpah:
http://portland.craigslist.org/clc/mcy/3286524308.html
This is addictive
http://portland.craigslist.org/clc/mcy/3286240961.html
Oh my gosh this quote is from the BigUgly link of the guy with chutzpah:
"The bike has 6 gears with a power band in each..."
Classic!
My personal fave
"has a powerband" or "aftermarket powerband".Was 250 bored out so now its a 310!
never raced
That has to be the funniest articel I've ever read on RacerX!!! Awesome writing! Please do more!! hahaha
Thanx a lot 151rider!!
I tried readin your post while sipping hot coffee
Started giggling mid sip
Burnt my tongue
Chipped my tooth
Dropped cup
Stepped on mug shards
I'm sending you my med bills for not putting appropriate disclaimer on your post.
Now how can i track down and buy this legendary cycle??
I think the old Yamaha's get it especially bad. I don't know where the official rule is written, but I have learned that beginning in 1985, all previous model YZ's had to be completely spray painted white to increase their value. Then, the rule was updated in 1998 to state that all previous model YZ's had to be completely spray painted blue, even the ones already painted white. To increase the value on other brands, they must be completely spray painted black. Again, I'm not sure where this rule is written, but based on the old bikes I see, this must be true.
What is the deal with people always posting, " was a 125 and bored it to a 200 (or bigger)." Do people really believe these adds?
WOW, A lot of new options for the begining racer! All I wanna buy is a Powerband could not find one at either home depot or lowes, but then those people dont know much. I wanna poweband!
Oh I know I will call Mitch or Donnie I think they sell them also? I did have a pwerband once but then it broke, never found one again?
Please help, I might have lost it when I took the spark plug out and did not catch it?
Happy hunting..............
FOUND POWEBANDS! I guess Bubba and Billy bob know their stuff? They buy Powerbands at the office supply store get em by the bag. They power the balsa wood airoplane they have! Ya just put the powerband on and twist the propeller till it gets real tight then you set it on your runway and it takes off! Pretty good from the guys that can get a 35th place holeshot!
Now we know what a power band is!
Best one I ever saw was from a guy in Hesperia, CA (all kinds of crap for sale in the high desert). It was a 1986 yz250 with 2003 crf450 plastics and an xr50 seat zip-tied to it. Right in the ad he said the bottom end was siezed, and he still wanted $750 for it. I think the heat was getting to what was left of his brain after he fried it with meth.
Hondare,......it was a retired late night desert delivery bike....heres todays oregon ...'clean used' [email protected]
Those bikes in craigslist look like excellent junk! :-D
the one and half kx is pretty sweet. wonder if that includes the powerband. i friggin love adds that say they come with powerband. i recently read an add on denvers craigslist. 2003 yz 250 "i'll throw in the powerband at no extra charge". funny thing is, i think he was serious. i recently moved to the upper peninsula of michigan. if you want a good laugh take a look at some of these adds. Yoopers craigslist=good stuff.
Here's a good Canadian one. Sweet deal considering it'll beat any other 125 out there!!!! He just needs to add this: "Must sell by tomorrow night, this is a very urgent sale! Price is firm."
http://muskoka.kijiji.ca/c-cars-vehicles-motorcycles-dirt-bikes-motocross-1985-Suzuki-RM-W0QQAdIdZ416629354