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Ask Ping!

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  • Cover up with a nice shirt like this
Dear Ping Ping,

What is the deal with all of the dudes walking around shirtless at the nationals and the pits in SX? Am I the only one who doesn't think it is cool or polite to show everyone your nipples?

Your thoughts please.
Peter Sundell


Dear Peter,

I couldn't agree with you more. Nipples on a woman are fantastic. They serve a purpose and for some odd, instinctual reason most men are infatuated with them. Men’s nipples, on the other hand, are hairy, pointless and mostly disgusting. The last thing I want to see is your hairy torso or the "sweet new nipple ring" that your buddy over at the tattoo shop hooked you up with. So unless you are going to cover up with pasties or enter a professional diving competition, let’s keep things hidden under a shirt, mmmkay?

PING

Ping,

Okay, so i have this buddy of mine that thinks he is a better athlete than me. He beats me at motocross and desert racing and 70% of time at H.O.R.S.E., yet he can't run; hell, he can't hardly walk. I beat him at r-ball, tennis, horseshoes, 80% football, swimming, phase 10 (the card game in case u didnt know) baseball for sure oh ya he beats me at road riding (bicycles) not by alot though i also beat him at bowling golf mtn biking (well thats not totally true but sometimes) i beat him at chopping wood climbing trees fishing hunting growing a beard working less than him i beat him at making bmx tracks i beat him to church every sunday i beat him home from movies when we drive separatly with the wives (he beats me at punctuation probably only cause he uses that spel checker dilly ) And one more thing he runs like a wounded gazelle. Now i wont get into all the life accomplishments i have achieved and he hasnt like eagle scout and former college athlete and so on but my question is who is the better athlete?(i will give him credit he can ride a dirt bike but beyond that as my letter plainly says thats about all he has) i also beat him at caving and shooting live targets and i mow my lawn on friday he mows his on saturday so i consider that a victory also but nonetheless please answer my question

Dear ?,

I was going to sort through your letter and fix the errors but I didn’t have an afternoon to kill. You aren’t exactly making a case for the superior intellect of the college athlete. Still, when I read your letter I was pumped to see your level of competitiveness. There are quite a few riders I know that would finish better if they had the killer instinct you obviously possess. The fact that you included chopping wood, Phase 10, getting to church, caving and mowing lawn among your wins speaks volumes about how badly you want to kick his ass. You know another thing you won? Writing letters to me. I haven’t seen his come in yet. Hell, yeah! Nice job, buddy, there’s another feather in your cap. Keep up the good work and tell your boy that you are far and away the better athlete.

PING


Ping,

You still pissed off at Ryno for his chickens#!t move he pulled on you back in ‘94 Unadilla National 2nd moto? If I were you I'd still be pissed off. I've attached some screen shots of the said altercation.

Joe


Dear Joe,

That crash was also included in the original
TerraFirma video… not my finest moment. I was sitting third or fourth behind Fro and a few other guys when Ryno went from the right side of the track to the left and cleaned me out. It was pretty dirty, but that was only the third national I’d ever done so I wasn’t sure if that was just how things went. The worst part was that the guy behind me hit me in the head with his handlebars and knocked me to the ground again. Joe, I could still be pissed, but what’s the point? Unless you have a time machine that can take me back to 1994 so I can ghost ride my bike into him when he comes around to lap me, then I think I’ll just let it go. It’s been long enough.

PING

 

Got a question for Ping? E-mail him at ping@racerxonline.com.

 

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